The 'What Is A Woman' Discourse has been Hijacked by Extremists on Both Sides

We need to return to practical reality ASAP

The problem with the 'what is a woman' debate is that both extremes are very, very ideological and extreme at the moment. Originally, the phrase 'trans women are women' was intended to encourage people to treat trans women as women in most social situations. It also points to the fact that trans women want to live their lives as women, and they are not dressing as women for performance purposes, like drag queens do, for example. It certainly wasn't meant to be an ideological statement to wield against those who disagree with you.

However, in recent years, some activists have taken the phrase 'trans women are women' to be absolute and binding in every instance, and its violation to automatically be a manifestation of transphobia, no exceptions allowed. For them, 'trans women are women' has become both ideology and dogma. They don't intend to allow any nuance into the debate. This is why, for example, such activists always rush to denounce sporting bodies' decisions to disallow trans women to compete as transphobic.

The problem with this approach is that it allows basically no acknowledgement of the concerns of other stakeholders in society, nor any possibility of compromise with them. After all, according to this worldview, any compromise solution, which would by definition be treating trans women differently sometimes, would violate their absolutist interpretation of 'trans women are women', and therefore be transphobic by definition. Even measures as sensible as requiring trans women to use separate locker rooms could be seen as transphobic. This would, of course, be seen as unreasonable by the majority of society. The result would be endless polarization, and the discrediting of the idea of trans rights altogether.

On the other hand, those on the opposite extreme are not only arguing about the aforementioned limitations of 'trans women are women'. They are actually insisting that 'trans women are not women', or even 'trans women are men', full stop, end of debate. This is the exact opposite extreme of the trans activists. While trans activists sometimes use 'trans women are women' to shut down discussion of differences, anti-trans forces are increasingly using 'trans women are not women' to deny the existence of gender identity and the validity of gender non-conformity altogether. They are basically using this debate to reinforce their own ideology that there is nothing valid about a gender identity that is at odds with biological sex.

I remember that, in the beginning, the argument was that biological sex matters, particularly in some contexts. This I can certainly agree with. However, more recently, the argument seems to have turned into 'only biological sex matters'. This is totally reactionary, and essentially take us backwards 50 years or more, back to the dark days when any gender non-conformity is seen as illegitimate, and the freedom and dignity of those who are not masculine men or feminine women are severely limited as a result. The political effects are already being seen, not just in the rolling back of trans rights in some places, but also in things like drag bans and a return of anti-gay politics. After all, if only biological sex matters, society wouldn't have to acknowledge the existence of gender non-conformity of any kind anymore, and not just in trans people either.

It is clear that neither extreme is good for individual freedom, or indeed the health of society, and we need a more middle ground approach. What we need is an approach that is rooted in practical reality, rather than ideological statements and commitments. What we also need is the flexibility to determine things on a case-by-case basis, rather than being forced to choose between the binary options of 'trans women are women' or 'trans women are not women'. While it might not be practical or reasonable to treat trans women exactly the same as natal women in every circumstance, because of biological differences or other reasons, this still does not invalidate the concept of gender identity in general, nor does it mean society should not accommodate the needs of trans people wherever it is reasonable to do so. A compassionate society should know better.