Trans People Are Not Upholding Gender Stereotypes. Society is.

There is a general taboo against even acknowledging the differences, on aggregate, between men and women in terms of what I would call gendered instincts, for lack of a better word. From a trans point of view, this makes it difficult to talk about the social aspects of gender dysphoria, which is a major reason for trans people transitioning. Of course, the presence of physical dysphoria is another important reason why trans people transition, and I would argue that it is the more important of the two sides of gender dysphoria. However, physical dysphoria is actually harder to relate to for the average person, simply because they don't experience anything similar. Meanwhile, the inability to talk about gendered instincts and the role they play in our everyday lives has made it difficult for the general public to understand and relate to trans people, in a similar way to how the public came around on gay marriage over the shared experiences of attraction, love and intimacy.

I also think the trans discourse has exposed a dissociative aspect to our cultural discourse: we are sort of pretending that we already live in the post-gender utopia envisioned by radical feminists back in the 1970s, where gendered behavior doesn't matter at all and the differences between men and women are no more than physical differences, except that we don't, and that it is also impossible because of biological reasons. To point out either that we don't or that we simply can't are both taboo. To back either point up with evidence is even more taboo. The result is a world where gender non-conforming people like feminine boys and masculine girls are still discriminated against, while this discrimination is de-facto taboo to talk about (especially in the case of feminine boys), even though it still exists in reality. Trans people have become a convenient scapegoat for this unhealthy situation, being blamed for both upholding gendered stereotypes and coercing gender non-conforming people to transition, when we only want to live our own lives in peace. In other words, trans people are being scapegoated for a very real societal problem that society doesn't have the guts to face.